Remember my post about how this cancer journey is like being dropped off at a trail head with no map, no idea how long the hike is, no idea the elevation gain, expected weather conditions and no idea if and when your snacks, water, backpacking gear and relevant necessities will appear? Yeah. Well, as it turns out that trail head drop off point was 2 years ago. We've crested mountains we would have sworn were the summit. We've meandered a bit and caught glimpses of a very dark valley and a steep mountain beyond that we all prayed wasn't a feature of this particular trail. And now? We're on the edge of that valley and the incline beyond.
I know from experience that I will find a cadence in the difficulty ahead, but I also know the burn of those muscles as they get pushed to their limit. I have a bit of muscle memory, and it all begs to abdicate. Even knowing there is no way but through, I don't want to do it.
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